Sunday, July 9, 2017

Warriors and Caregivers

Did you know that we are born with certain traits ?

You may be a Caregiver or a Warrior 
              
      
These same traits are seen all over the world - in the US, The Middle East, Asia and in Africa.




Most of us have a combination of both traits (but a very small percentage of the population will have one or the other)







In the USA people with the Warrior trait are called Conservatives.  And Caregiver trait are called Progressives or Liberals.


Values of a Warrior :

  • Avoid Harm and Protect the weak 
  • Be Fair
  • Respect Authoritythis is a good trait as long as the folks in a position of Authority are good people.  Otherwise Warriors can be mislead by a person they respect.
  • Group LoyaltyThis may lead a person to abandon right and wrong in order to safe guard the interest of the group 
  • Purity 


Values of a Caregiver :
  • Avoid Harm and Protect the weak  
  • Be fair
  • Instead of authority, they believe in equal power - This can make their team less efficient as they try to accommodate everyone's point of view
  • Instead of Group Loyalty, they are willing to invite others in 
  • Highly Empathetic - Sometimes can be mislead
  • Purity 

This has been the moral truth for centuries.


Each individual looks at life through their own set of values.

And each individual ALWAYS thinks that THEY are right and the other person is wrong - that is our default.


Another way of saying this is that we all have what is called Cognitive Dissonance.

So, what is Cognitive Dissonance ?







This has been the moral truth for centuries

So, why does it feel like there is more anger and hatred among us now ?

Well, that is because something HAS changed...

What HAS changed is that a lot of organizations mostly in the US have tried and (in my opinion) succeeded in defining folks with a different ideology as 'THE ENEMY'

This has created a massive imbalance and anger and a disregard for people with a different ideology both in the US and in other parts of the world.










This anger and hatred is destroying ALL of us

Both as Individuals
And as a Nation


When we are angry and frustrated the part of the brain that is most active is the 'fight or flight' part.  And the activity of the Frontal lobe which governs reasoning goes down.



That is why conversations about Solutions to the problems we face are ending up as arguments and heated fights ...






We are not able to make good decisions if our main emotion is anger.

As most religions state, the best decisions are made when we are calm and at Peace.







In a flourishing democracy the leadership of a country will have some folks that are Warriors and others that are Caregivers.  

Unfortunately this balance is no longer present in the USA and also in some other countries in the world.  The reasons for this are many.

But the main reason is that a group of organizations have tried and (in my opinion) succeeded in defining folks with a different ideology as 'THE ENEMY'
Rather than a Fellow American with a different point of view.




So what should we do ?
How can we resolve this issue ?
How can we Unite the USA and the world ?

The SOLUTION  is Simple


We need to UNITE and bring people with different political ideologies together.

And there is only ONE way to do that.  That is by educating each other about these concepts.

One person at a time.

Please click here to learn the 6 steps that you could take to have this conversation.

Please click here to join our Facebook Group

Yes it is an uphill battle
But it is a battle we can win

We have to have this conversation with one person at a time

Together we can create a ground swell that will be hard to defeat

And that my friends is the only way we will win this battle ...







References
1. TED talk from Prof Haidt
http://www.ted.com/talks/jonathan_haidt_on_the_moral_mind.html


Sunday, February 22, 2015

The Conversation #UnitingTheUSA

Dear friends
Please try to have this conversation 

  • Face to Face
  • At a time when both of you are relaxed.


Chats do not work
Texts do not work
Long face book comments do not work
(This is becuase 93% of human communications are non verbal)


Our Goal
Is to Unite The USA


I usually start by stating that I have a couple of facts to share.  Here are the facts


Fact #1
You love the United State of America
I love the United State of America

Powerful forces are trying to divide us

If we are to save our Beloved Country, we need to put aside our political ideologies and WE NEED TO UNITE ...






Fact # 2
I cannot change you
You cannot change me
But, You can change your self 






Fact #3
We are born with certain traits.
These traits lead us to have either a "Caregiver" or a "Warrior" outlook in life.

These same traits are seen all over the world - in the US, The Middle East, Asia and in Africa.

Prof Jonathan Haidt, a Social Psychologist has done a lot of studies on this (see a link to his Ted Talk in the reference section)

According to Prof Haidt, we are born with a basic set of values.

Warriors seem to emphasize five Values :

  • Avoid Harm and Protect the weak 
  • Be Fair
  • Respect Authority - this is a good trait as long as the folks in a position of Authority are good people.  Otherwise Warriors can be mislead by a person they respect.
  • Group Loyalty - This may lead a person to abandon right and wrong in order to safe guard the interest of the group
  • Purity 


Caregivers seem to Emphasize Five Values :
  • Avoid Harm and Protect the weak  
  • Be fair
  • Instead of authority, they believe in equal power - Since they do not like leaders, they may fail as a team
  • Instead of Group Loyalty, they are willing to invite others in 
  • Purity 

This has been the moral truth for centuries.


Each individual looks at life through their own set of values.

And each individual ALWAYS thinks that THEY are right and the other person is wrong - that is our default.



Fact #4
Just now there are a lot of forces that are dividing us

These organizations have succeeded in defining folks with a different ideology as 'THE ENEMY'

And they are using a basic Clinical Psychological concept call "Cognitive Desonance"






Scientist have found that the part of the brain that is most active during this time is NOT the "reasoning" part but the 'fight or flight' part of the brain







That is why most of these conversations end up real quickly in arguments and heated fights ...







Now that you understand why this is happening to us, let us do something to reverse this.

And Unite the United State of America and the world  ...



The Plan ...  
# 1  -   Please shut down the TV for two weeks.  Stop reading blogs, emails and listening to any Radio program that are trying to divide us.   This will give you a reprieve and clear your mind.

#2  -  Know who you are.  Know what your ideology is.  Then realize and accept that your perception of a problem may be different from the perception of another individual.

# 3 -  Spend some time thinking about this.
Remember - the "facts"  you may believe in may not be the "whole truth"
There may be additional facts that you have not heard.

#4 -  Learn the art of "Active Listening"




#5 - Please click here to join our Face Book group

Please Click here for our Face Book page to take the Pledge today
Pledge to
Respect Everyone
Love Everyone
Actively Listen to Everyone 

Or if you do not have a face book page please Click here to take the pledge


#6 - Please share this with everyone you know.  
And keep the conversation going. 
Yes it is an uphill battle.  
But we CAN win this battle if we all Unite...









Now let us spend time finding solutions to our problems TOGETHER ...

Now you are ready 

Start to talk to one another
First identify the problem - different folks will frame the problem differently
Remember to actively Listen during this process

Then write down all the solutions
Choose the best solution using ALL political ideologies
That is how we will be able to #Unite The USA




References :
1. Ted Talk by Prof Jonathan Haidt
http://www.ted.com/talks/jonathan_haidt_on_the_moral_mind.html

2. Most human communications are non verbal
http://www.nonverbalgroup.com/2011/08/how-much-of-communication-is-really-nonverbal/

3.  Why facebook arguments are useless
https://youtu.be/Qe5pv4khM-Y




Thursday, January 8, 2015

There is a better way

Long ago doctors used Penicillin to treat Pneumonia
Now most bacteria are resistant to Penicillin - So most doctors have stopped using Penicillin to treat pneumonia. They use other Antibiotics.

When it comes to implementing and enacting Public Policies the ground game has changed.

So, why are we using the same OLD tactics to get things done ?
Obviously we are not going to "win" the game.
 - That is like using Penicillin for Pneumonia - The patient will die :(




So how can WE THE PEOPLE get the politicians to listen to us ?

Let us look at the facts on the ground (I know these facts are NOT FAIR - But we have to remember that these ARE the facts.
  • 95% of the time the person who wins an election is the person who has the most money.
  • And only 0.01% of us have the kind of money the Politicians want.
  • Therefore Politicians are forced to hob nob with the 0.01% and make them and the multinational Corporations happy.  Otherwise THEY are going to loose THEIR job.
  • Do not believe me ?  Please click here to see the daily change in net worth on the top 100 Billionaires on bloomberg.com  (For example on the 27th of February, Mr Koch's net wealth increased by 50 million in one day and Ms Walton's net wealth increased by 46 million in one day)

Even the so called SMALL Political PACS that we have  DO NOT have the kind of money the Politicians need.  So the politicians will "listen" to these small PACs ONLY IF the policy is okay with the 0.01% of us who are very rich and the large multinational Corporations.


Conclusion - Money IS NO LONGER our Strength


And those $5 to $500 donations - think about what happens to them - they will be used to buy advertisements in the Main Stream Media - currently owned by 5 Large Corporations.  So basically YOU made these large Corporations and their owners richer.  And YOU lost the $5 that you need to buy food for your family :(

So WHAT IS OUR STRENGTH ?

Our strength lies in NUMBERS



That may be why there is a constant attempt by some to divide us

Conservatives vs Liberal
Muslims vs Christians
Male workers vs Female workers
Pro choice vs Pro life
Union workers vs Non Union workers  etc etc etc





For the first time in the US we have been brainwashed into thinking that a person with a different ideology is "OUR ENEMY" 

Not a fellow American with a different point of view

We in turn play in to this theme by demonizing folks that have a different point of view.  And this theme gets reinforced.

We HAVE TO CHANGE this division NOW

As medical doctors I believe that this is the biggest Public Health problem we face today.

So what can we do ?
We need to do everything in our power to Unite the USA.

I strongly believe that we should use the resources of our small political PACS for this purpose. 

Trying to support individual Politicians by giving them money is NOT going to get us any where.

Please will you join me ?

Please click here to learn the 6 steps that you could take to have this conversation.

Yes it is an uphill battle
But it is a battle we can win

We have to have this conversation with one person at a time

Together we can create a ground swell that will be hard to defeat

And that my friends is the only way we will win this battle ...

Thank you
















Saturday, November 29, 2014

High Five Movement

Dear Friends

I cried my heart out the day Trayvon Martin died.

Then I started to read everything I could find about the situation. The history, clinical psychology, personal opinions, historical data and looked within my heart to find out what we can do to make a difference.

This is my humble opinion about this problem and I will share a simple action we can take to make a difference TODAY.

---------------------------------------------------------------

Remember, 
We are NOT going to find a solution to a problem that started in 1619 tomorrow.
But BEFORE we find a solution, we need to UNDERSTAND the WHY

Next we need to create a series of steps to find a solution to this horrible problem our country is facing.

First step is to understand the "why"
Second step is to look within you and understand how you perceive this problem.
Third step is to create a dialogue between the parties involved with the intention of creating solutions.
Final step is to create public policies to solve this problem.

But WE CANNOT AFFORD TO WAIT ANY MORE

We have to do something NOW

This is a Simple Solution to stop our kids dying NOW

Please note this is NOT about 'Victim Bashing"
This is about 'Victim" Empowerment and Saving their lives NOW

--------------------------------------------------------------

Mahatma Gandhi once said
"The enemy is Fear
We think it is Hate
But it is Fear"


Scientists have found out that all human beings subconsciously make split second decisions when they see another human being.

Our previous cultural, religious and societal input helps us to make these decisions.


Theses subconscious, split second decisions belong to two categories
a. Is this a friendly person - someone who is NOT going to harm me
OR
b. Is this a person that may harm me






If our subconscious mind decides that it is a person that is going to harm me, our body elicits what is called the "Fight or Flight" reaction


When the Fight of Flight part of the brain is activated - the part of the brain that "reasons"  becomes less active






Just now a large percentage of people in the USA has a negative perception about Young African, Latino and Muslim Men.

The only way we can SAVE THEIR LIVES is to change this perception

And we have to do this NOW ...


So how can we do this ?

Here is one way we can change this perception


Please stay with me for one moment....

What if we created a High Five Movement


A Movement with a Logo like this
(Of significance is that this is an out line of the hand of Doctor Martin Luther King)







Then invite Young African, Latino, Muslim and other Ethnic minorities who are Americans to join in


They pledge to :

  • Respect Everyone, Love Everyone and Actively Listen to Everyone
  • Adopt a healthy lifestyle
  • Go to school and complete their education
  • Give back to their community
  • Love our country and Love Mother Earth


Proudly wear a cap or a wrist band to show they are active participants of this movement.  


Yes, all the nay sayers will come after us.


But we will start changing the perception and the fear that is associated with a Young African, Latino, Muslim and Other Minorities.


People will start associating the Positive Logo with the person who is wearing it.


And even if we saved One Person from dying - it would be worth our while.


We will also help these young men and women to grow up with a set of values that will help them as well as help society as a whole.
It will Empower them
And that in turn will help them to achieve their dreams







A win win situation



Please Click Here to take the pledge today.  Then take a moment to share with all your friends

Here is our web site   www.PledgeHighFive.org

Thank you


Reference Articles
1. Perception
https://youtu.be/Zj91x5H5ohY

2. How our brains perceive Race  http://billmoyers.com/2014/12/02/science-cops-shoot-young-black-men/

3. Why Police shoot young black men  http://billmoyers.com/2014/12/02/science-cops-shoot-young-black-men/

4. Test your bias  http://www.understandingprejudice.org/iat/

5. An extensive study on the bias against Black kids  http://www.apa.org/pubs/journals/releases/psp-a0035663.pdf

6. Historical perspective 
http://www.nybooks.com/articles/2017/07/13/presumption-of-guilt/

6. Spider Vs Butterflies
https://www.facebook.com/archdukedostuff/videos/1322171807810676/
x

Friday, November 28, 2014

Let us learn about each other

Did you know that we are born with certain traits ?
These traits lead us to have either a Liberal or a Conservative outlook in life.

These same traits are seen all over the world - in the US, The Middle East, Asia and in Africa.

Prof Jonathan Haidt, a Social Psychologist has done a lot of studies on this (see a link to his Ted Talk in the reference section)

According to Prof Haidt, we are born with a basic set of values.

Conservatives seem to emphasize five Values :

  • Avoid Harm and Protect the weak 
  • Be Fair
  • Respect Authority - this is a good trait as long as the folks in a position of Authority are good people.  Otherwise Conservatives can be mislead by a person they respect.
  • Group Loyalty - This may lead a person to abandon right and wrong in order to safe guard the interest of the group - just now gun control comes to mind
  • Purity - in the eyes of a conservative this is why they find it hard to accept issues like Gay rights and abortions


Liberals seem to Emphasize Five Values :
  • Avoid Harm and Protect the weak  
  • Be fair
  • Instead of authority, they believe in equal power
  • Instead of Group Loyalty, they are willing to invite others in - Immigration policies come into mind
  • Purity - just now this is manifested as a purity of the food we eat - issues with GMO foods come to mind

This has been the moral truth for centuries.


Each individual looks at life through their own set of values.

And each individual ALWAYS thinks that THEY are right and the other person is wrong - that is our default.










So, why does it feel like there is more anger and hatred among us now ?

Well, that is because something HAS changed...


What HAS changed is that a lot of organizations mostly in the US have tried and (in my opinion) succeeded in defining folks with a different ideology as 'THE ENEMY'






This has created an anger and a hatred that is destroying ALL of us

Both as Individuals
And as a Nation



Scientist have found that the part of the brain that is most active during this time is NOT the "reasoning" part but the 'fight or flight' part of the brain







That is why most of these conversations end up real quickly in arguments and heated fights ...






We are not able to make good decisions if our main emotion is anger.
As most religions state, the best decisions are made when we are calm and neutral

Now that you understand why this is happening to us, let us do something to reverse this.

And Unite the United State of America and the world  ...


Another concept worth visiting 
Value set of a Warrior  and a Caregiver are different
According to Prof Haigt Caregivers value Compassion, Liberty and Fairness.
Whereas Warriors value all 6 equally - That is Loyalty, Authority, Sanctity, Compassion, Liberty and Fairness.





Policy making and the concept of Strict Father and Nurturing Parent 

A Strict Father
 is the bread winner. So he needs to be strong.  He needs to be strict.  And punish the kids when they do bad things.  The wife’s role is to take care of the family and stay home.  The wife is not an equal partner in this relationship.
Most Warriors (Conservatives) believe in a Strict Father model of parenting.

This would explain why the Conservatives do not support equal pay and a safety net for the poor.  In their mind the poor needs to be punished for not taking care of them selves.


A Nurturing Parent thinks that the kids are vulnerable and they need to be protected.  And both parents have to work together as a team.
Most Caregivers (Progressives) think this way.

That is why they believe in equal pay and safety nets.

In my opinion the truth lies somewhere in the middle.





So what should we do ?
How can we resolve this issue ?

The SOLUTION  is Simple


We need to UNITE and bring people with different political ideologies together 

And here is one way we can do that 

We need to share this knowledge with everyone we know.
One person at a time.

Please click here to learn the 6 steps that you could take to have this conversation.

Yes it is an uphill battle
But it is a battle we can win

We have to have this conversation with one person at a time

Together we can create a ground swell that will be hard to defeat

And that my friends is the only way we will win this battle ...








References
1. TED talk from Prof Haidt
http://www.ted.com/talks/jonathan_haidt_on_the_moral_mind.html